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i like being commented ;)
chapter 3: now i was on my way to novigrad, to kill radovid the ice-cream seller and get my pumpkin reward. so, where are chapter begins: i just left crow perch, and started walking north, but(t) then i reallized that i don't know the direction, not even one, so q(f)uck one direction! i started walking around, and suddenly heard a loud roar: "it's mister mitens!" i yelled and ran to the place the roar came from. i saw like, the number after four (i forgot), men holding a cage wich inside mister mitens was! i quaked to them and they turned to me, they wore masks, and had swords, so i thought: "oh shit! gay italians!" and ran back. i wasen't looking where i was runing, and accedentily hit a man. he had two swords on his back, a wolf neckless, cat eyes and he wore armor, but he was an old dude. "hello! your not a gay italian like those dudes over there right?" the old dude was suprised and pulled a shiny sword at me, so i turned my back at him to show him mad cause it's not nice to pull swords at people. but then hitted me with his sword! " Wait! don't kill me man! it's not my falt im much swag then you!" the old dude looked confused and said: "a wereduck? i don't have any of these in my thropies!" said the oldude ( see what i just did? so swag). "yeah i am a wereduck now stop being so rude and put your sword on your back!" i quaked. the oldude said sorry and got the sword back to HEs back. " you surprised me. i'm not used to see wereducks, damm until now i didn't knew there such things!" he said. "and i didn't know old dudes like you can fight." i said. he smiled at me. "my name is vesemir, i am a witcher from kear moren, do you know what witchers are?" he asked. "yeah, they attack innocent ducks." "no no, witchers kill monsters. awh, it dosen't metter, now for a differen't subject: what your name? who are you?". damm this oldude asked so many questions. "my name is... amm... wereduck! yes, wereduck. i was an ofiery bard until a dogling, i think it's called dogling, cursed me! so now i am a wereduck." " okay, wereduck, i better get to my way. some time ago my friend,geralt, told me to go cause he found his sorcereress beloved." "sorry to hear that master vesemir, but, i need help to free my tiger mister mitens. he got kidnnaped by gay italian that who knows what they want to do to him!" i quaked. "okay, il'l help you free your tiger, come." he saids and went with me to the gay italians. "what the quak?(they didn't really said quak), look at that! a witcher and walking duck!" thay started to laugh. "hey! you quaking quaksuckers! come here and quak the quak out you, sons of quakers!" "what did you said, boy? your old mutant can't deffend you." vesemir pulled his sword out and said: "listen, there's been a mistake. you took that duck tiger and..""you took me mister mitens busterds! imma kill you now k? and you an't do NOTHING cause your not sssswwwwaaaaagggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" i interrupted. they ran to as, and vesemir put 3 of them and i huged two, everyone need love. later, when all of them was as(s)leep, i went to mister mitens. "hello mister mitens! it's me!" and then he started crying of joy, i think. i tried to pet him but like i said:he is UNPETTIBLE. i said goodby to my me8 vesemir and took directions from he'm, to my way novigrad, with mister mitens by my side.