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Tyromancy, or the Noble Art of Cheese Divination

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For cheese, like the innards of sacrificed animals, the flight of a swallow or vivid dreams, can be used for divination. The depth and size of a cheese's holes reveal when rains will fall in the coming year, while the color of the mold veins tells who shall love whom, and the scent of a hard grana padano predicts which army will vanquish its foes and which shall perish.
The best divination, however, is done using the ancient method of fondue. One must simply melt two different kinds of cheese, preferably emmental and gruyere, in white wine, or in a pinch, in a dry apple cider. Then one must use a long stick to immerse a morsel of bread in the resultant thick soupy mixture, all the while keeping in mind the question, "What shall my child be like when he (or she, as the case may be) grows?" Then bring the cheese-covered morsel of breat up to a candle, so that it casts a shadow on the wall: the shape will provide a sure and easily understood answer to your query.

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